Its 7:00 clock in evening. Now, its the time for him to come home. I prepare dinner for him. I thought today we will have a great night. we will talk a lot and I share lots and lots of thing that are running inside me. Like I feel bad about some conversation with her mother. I feel bad thatt his bhabhi talks to me rudely. I will tell me every single detail and then only i will feel light. Till then my heart feels very heavy. I cry in front of me because my mother-in-law shouted on me on a mere thing even that was not my mistake and she has not listen to me. I am not in a mood of complaining anything to him but I just want to feel light after telling him all events that happened throughout the day. After that he cuddle me and then we make love. All thoughts are running simultaneously in my mind I prepared dinner and after some time we left for our room. He is busy in playing games on his mobile. Also, TV is on. I told him that either you should play or watch TV. He said he can manage both.
I sat beside him and slowly said look I want to talk to you. Please keep this mobile aside. He said okk..you tell me I am listening to you. Why he never understand that I dont want a talk like this.I told him thousand time that you should talk to me properly with no mobile and no tv. I want a proper chit-chat in which I share something about all things that happened with me through the day and about my feelings what I am thinking and I am feeling from inside. But there is no response, I told him some act but when I notice he was not paying any heed and only say huhh after my each sentence and still focusing on his mobile game. Who the hell talk like this. Then, I stop talking and lay down. After 30 minutes he said you said U want to talk and u are talking something then why u stopped. I laughed. I mutter to myself, 'bdi jaldi yaad aa gya that I am talking'. Then I says nothing. He says okk. I thought you were saying something. A electricity wave gone through my all body hearing this I thought that I should give him a slap...that idiot I want to talk but not like this way that u kept staring at mobile and Tv. I want you to stare me, hold my hand, look into my eye and then we talk. I said nothing and lay down quietly by his side. He is still busy in playing game. A tear drop down from my eyes and I thought that I should kept myself busy in mobile so that when he wants to talk I give him no attention and maybe he realise on his own that how I feel. I am busy in searching newsfeed in Facebook. After 1 hour he was tired of playing game on mobile and now he lay down on my side hugging me and asking' what I am doing. I said nothing just reading newsfeed. he said okk and lets come to me I want to make love. I thought that is so easy for these men to make love with any mood and without caring for your wife mood whether she is ready or not. He starts touching me all over the body I pay no attention to his touch. His gentle caressing does not arouse anything in me because I know that love and sex comes from inside not just by touching. Soon, he was over me and starts kissing me all over the body. I was still like a dead body and he even does not care because he was cared for his desire and lust. After he has done, He said good night to me and fall asleep. He even does not notice that I have not said good bye to him and not in good mood but he has no impact and soon he fall asleep. I just thought whether it was only me who feels like this way.. whether I am overreacting that I want to talk like my way not his way. He also say 'Tum btati kyun ni ho agar tumhe bura lgta h toh'. How can one say about that. One must understand atleast he is my husband and he should understand that I want to talk simple. You have three minds one on mobile one on Tv and 3rd on me. How can I talk like this way. He fall asleep and my night goes like thinking and thinking and crying. I know its a small thing but I dont know why I cried.
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